The Purity Project of OKC

When you get down to it, the beginning of all problems associated with sexual addictions and compulsions begin with thoughts we carry in our minds.  In our work here at the Purity Project, we meet a lot of people who have something in common: they find it hard to control their thoughts.  Even when they are not acting out, they constantly have thoughts that are just as pornographic and lustful as the images they constantly view.  While this is never a good thing, it can become a real source of frustration once one is ready to start recovery and wishes to rid themselves of these sexually impure thoughts.  Today you will learn several simple ”thought stopping” mind hacks that you can use to take control of your thoughts.

Interrupt your thoughts with talk.

Try this simple experiment. In your mind begin mentally counting from one to ten. At some point, start singing, out loud, something like, “Mary had a little lamb.”  Did you notice what happened?  The instant you started singing your mind stopped thinking about counting. This is a very simple technique for stopping your thoughts.  Fortunately for my friends, talking works just as good or better than singing. 

Here is how I use this technique.  When some thought comes to my mind that I believe shouldn’t be there, I begin saying a positive affirmation.  I like to use scriptures like 2nd Corinthians 5:17, If any man is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone the new has come.  I have found there is great power in speaking aloud the Word of God–especially the ones which contain promises.  There is a whole science behind affirmations, but I believe this may well be a reason why the early Israelites were commanded to wear scriptures over their foreheads and upon their wrists to remind them of the commands of God.

Just say no!

Another thought stopping technique that is very easy to use is to mentally think, or say out loud, “NO!” or “Stop!” Here is how the technique works.  When a thought comes across your mental screen, that you don’t want to entertain, you think or say an emphatic “NO!” Then, you intentionally move your attention to something else that you consider to be positive. 

Here is how I use this technique.  When a thought comes to my attention that I’ve decided I don’t want in my mind, I say, in my mind, “Stop!”  Then, I reach my hand into my pocket and take out a small, but smooth, blue glass stone (like the kind you buy at craft stores for decoration).  I look at the stone and say “Thanks!” I chose the blue stone because I associate the color blue with God (don’t ask me how I came to that conclusion!). Besides being soothing to the touch, the little stone serves to remind me that God is always with me; and, it reminds me of my desire to maintain purity in my thought life.  This technique also helps me be more grateful.  Sometimes, rather than taking the blue stone out of my pocket, I just place my hand in my pocket and focus my attention upon its smoothness.  Other people may find it more convenient to carry a small crucifix, or some other religious object, and use it as a means of refocusing attention.  At one time, I carried a set of scripture cards with me.  I would reach for them and read as needed.

Thought Replacement

A final thought stopping technique I have found to be simple and easy to use is thought replacement.  I always have someone friend or acquaintance who is need of prayers.  When an unwelcome thought occurs, I say a short prayer for my friend who is in need.  One week I suppose I prayed at least 100 prayers for a buddy who was dying of cancer!  One of the good things about this technique, for those of us who are believers, is that we allow God to transform something that was negative into a positive.  I also like the fact that it is a helpful technique that reminds me to pray for others–as well as myself.

Things to Keep in Mind

To keep everything simple, I will only mention three things to keep in mind when using my thought stopping techniques.  The first is that you should keep things positive.  Never beat yourself up when a negative thought comes through your mind.  It may take some time for you to even be aware that you are thinking something negative.  The important thing is to practice.  When you notice the thought, don’t criticize yourself; instead, just do one of these positive thought techniques, that have been mentioned above, and allow yourself the joy of transforming a negative thought into a positive one.

A second thing to keep in mind is that these thought stopping techniques work best if you combine them with physical action.  Don’t keep it in the mental realm; instead, combine some physical action such as speaking aloud, physically touching something or listening to something.  A physical action makes it easier to stop the negative thought.  For instance, in the second technique you’ll notice that I combine the act of physically touching the stone with the verbalized “Thanks.”  The more of our senses we use, the better.

A final thing to keep in mind is to be prepared.  If you use technique one, you should have some stock scriptures or affirmations that you will say for the next few days.  If you use the Just Say No technique number, you will need to have an appropriate object in your pocket or purse at all times.  If you choose the Thought Replacement Technique you’ll need to have a few people in mind that you’ll say a short prayer for.

My Favorite

Of the three techniques I have mentioned, I like the first one the best.  That is because it works best for me.  I find it direct and easy to use.  Speaking up, or singing, is easy for me to do and I find that my negative thoughts go away–right away.  Plus, it helps that I’m a big believer in the power of speaking God’s word!  The second technique works well for me for those times when it is inconvenient for me to speak or sing.  I’ve never found a time when it seemed inappropriate for me to reach in my pocket for my smooth blue glass stone.

I encourage you to try these techniques and see which of them work for you.  Also, I encourage you to make a comment below and tell me about any of the things you do to help you with your thought stopping process.  I have no doubt but what there are many great ideas out there.  So be sure you tell me about yours.